Reviewing of Please, Sir by Rachel Kramer Bussel

May 13, 2010

Typically stories of erotica just turn me off.  They’re usually cheesy and I cannot connect with them at all. After a few pages read, I put the book down and that’s it. With Please, Sir that is not the case.

About a year ago my boyfriend introduced me to Rachel Kramer Bussel via the internet. I found her interesting and amazed at how open she is about sexuality. So when my boyfriend pointed out she was looking for people to review her book  Please, Sir I jumped at the chance.

Please, Sir is amazing and addicting. I have a time putting down the book. But then I have to because I admit, it gets me worked up in a good way. I can definitely connect with many of the stories I have read. I guess one thing that amazes me is that some of the people who submitted their stories to Rachel aren’t exactly completely open with their sexuality. I would expect one who is open like Rachel to just lay it out and not care about being proper. In one story I was reading the word arse was there. Arse? I use arse around my kids, around my traditional family and friends. I would definitely like to see more openness in the stories.

Words like cunt, wet pussy, ass get me riled up reminding me of every time I am with my boyfriend. For me I can connect with stories that are graphic in nature: fingers slide into my wet pussy, smacking my ass cheeks so hard I can feel the blood at the surface wanting to come out, buries his cock inside, thrusting deeply.

There are stories of pain, torment, being tied up, handcuffed besides the erotic nibbling of the ears, kissing the neck, making out in the shower. In some there are high levels of perversion while some are down to earth. Most of them are completely open about their sexuality, not afraid to do things out in the open such as the story of Knot Here!

Rachel’s story at the end definitely reminds me of my own life. I don’t know about others as far as the connectivity with the stories are. This book grabs my attention and keeps it there to a point it torments me when I am alone wanting my boyfriend to be near.

Hands around my neck as I feel the blood reaching the surface of my skin. I feel like I am ready to pass out and then he releases for a moment to kiss me. He knows what buttons to push that turn me on that leave me at the edge of craziness. Being turned on and made to wait.

If you are looking to read a true BDSM book this is definitely one of them. This book is not for the lighthearted.

My girlfriend and her heart attack

April 30, 2010

As my last post mentioned, I haven’t posted in awhile because my girlfriend had a heart attack. The scariest thing in my life by far. As I was sitting in the waiting room with her family, my boyfriend (aka her husband) I just kept flashing back to the day before.

She and I had spent the day together first a threesome then the two of us making out, washing cars with no tops on and just being silly. The one thing that was etched in my mind was laying face to face with her kissing. I wondered if I would ever get to do that again.

I honestly could not handle the first time I went in to see her post op.  The day before had been an incredible time for the both of us. Kissing passionately, holding each other while our partner watched.

The first time she woke up I was ecstatic. Of course she revealed later that she didn’t even remember that time. She was still on the ventilator and groggy. Later after the tubes were removed I joked with her about wouldn’t she rather have a cock stuck down her throat than those tubes? She just tried to laugh, really. I had so much wanted to say that to her before they were taken out. I just didn’t know how she would react.

The moment of truth came when I sadly had to part with her for awhile. When I leaned over to hug her she kissed me on the lips, right in front of the nurse. I walked away feeling better knowing she wasn’t giving up on us.

Four days post op she was sent to a step down room. Our partner (her husband) brought the laptop and web cam so I could see her. I had to go back to school which is 100 miles away. It was hard for me to leave her. She wanted to me to go back and finish school. I knew I would get to spend some more time with her soon.

The most exciting part had to have been six days post op for her. She was in a step-down room and it was just the two of us. I was helping her get to the bathroom. One of the things she said helped her was eye to eye contact. I got so distracted doing that because her eyes were oddly green.

I say oddly because the ONLY time her eyes turn green is when she is horny.

She said she admitted that she was tempted to push me down on the bed a time or two.

Funny part is I believe she was most comfortable with me being around than anyone else. She had become very self conscious of her scars especially with her husband. It was easier for her to show me the incisions. We could talk without criticism (alot was said and questioned as to why she didn’t notice the signs by family and friends). I looked past it all and I still could see the beautiful, sexy person I loved so much.

The Poly Life on Hold…Sort of

April 30, 2010

I haven’t posted in a while mainly for two reasons: 1) This is my senior year and final semester in college and 2)My girlfriend had a massive heart attack in February.

Life has been like a roller coaster ride for sure. I can say though that my girlfriend is doing so much better now and in fact, she and I have gotten closer.

I was really concerned this would set her back and she wouldn’t want to continue the great relationship we have been building. It was totally the opposite with her. We have spent a great deal of time together shopping, just hanging out, snuggling and most of all talking.

As far as any threesomes, we have not had one since the day before her heart attack…

The Poly Life Then and Now

February 22, 2010

Being polyamorous is like a roller coaster ride, at least for me. I get to see my boyfriend in person at least once a week. Everyday we talk on the phone and most weekdays we’re on the webcam. The two of us are definitely close and definitely in love. He doesn’t like having to leave me alone or see me head back home after a weekend with him and his wife. For the two of us we are amazingly passionate with each other.

Now with his wife though, it’s a different story. She and I have a relationship that sometimes could make one want to jump off a cliff. Other times we can be the best of friends. There are times we want to be around each other and other times we want to beat the living crap out of one another. She and I typically talk to each other anywhere from once a week to four, five or more times a week.

There is definitely jealousy and resentment at times. From my perspective, I admit this fully.  My boyfriend a few years ago confided in both myself and his wife individually and as a group that he wanted two women. Yes, it was a huge shock for me since I had in mind that he was sick and tired of being with his wife whom he felt had neglected him for years.  I honestly believed he was going to leave his wife since he had been seriously looking into finding a place to stay while sorting out his feelings.

I remember so much about when his wife found out about us. She was definitely angry and I remember the first “heart to heart” conversation she and I had down at their creek. She was adamant that one day she was going to be the only one in his life again. Basically she was trying to tell me I was going to be a fling. I would get tired of everything and walk away like everyone else had (the others were in for a threesome only).

Fast forward three years and things have dramatically changed.

He and I are passionately in love with each other. Many people we associate with know that the three of us are in a relationship. They will ask how he handles two women which we laugh about. Most people that know about us are for the most part understanding.  We know though there are plenty out there who would in two shakes of a lambs tail turn their backs.

My boyfriend has definitely gotten braver about spending time with me and expressing how he feels. Although this is really a tough issue when it comes to his wife. What scares her so much is the fact her husband is deeply in love with another woman. He gets excited when he sees me and of course he and I can get seriously silly when together.

He and I connect like we’ve never connected with anyone else. That connection feeds our passion with one another. There are times things become very intense between the two of us that we feel like we are going to lose control. I am talking about passion that has stayed alive and progressively gotten stronger in the last three years.

When we first met, he admitted much of what had went on in his adult life including affairs, flings, threesomes,etc. It didn’t take long either for him to share with me that other women didn’t appeal to him anymore like it used to. He felt I was special in his life and he has let me know in many countless ways throughout the three years we have been together.

With his wife though, for the longest time I remember her being insistent that he thought this or that woman was hot and that he would have sex with her if the opportunity arose. It took a couple of times to get it across to her that he was NOT this way anymore and then she quit.

Right after she found out about the two of us, we all traveled to Florida to pick up a vehicle I had won on Ebay. This was my first time to be spending the night with the two of them. When I did I felt awkward as did taking a shower with her.

The one part of the trip I will probably NEVER forget was the second night when we were staying in Daytona Beach, Florida.  Right after she found out her husband and I had been together, she was insistent that she watch us have sex. Not sure why, but my boyfriend explained that he was sure that once she seen us make out then she wouldn’t ask anymore.

That was definitely the truth. I can still remember the time he and I were on one of the beds having sex. Her standing over the bed watching us getting it on with his arms wrapped around me.

Afterwards while I was taking a shower, she and him talked. She straight out asked him if he was in love with me and he flat out told her YES.

You would think that after your loved one says something like this that the point would somewhat have gotten across. It only partially has.

Open Love, Sex, and Life in an Open Marriage by Jenny Block

February 4, 2010

For Christmas I gave my boyfriend the gift that he wanted.  Jenny Block’s book titled Open: Love, Sex, and Life in an Open Marriage.

Once he was done he passed it on to his wife who felt really connected to what Jenny had to say. Now it is my turn to read her book. So far it has helped all of us  in knowing there are other Polyamory couples who share some of the same issues.

Jenny talks about her hopes, dreams and how her marriage started out, like any other monogamous marriage. She discusses the challenges she has had in her marriage as well as the threesomes and bi-sexual relationships. Jenny is really open in her book about what she wanted which is to be in an open marriage. The marriage has had its ups and downs which Jenny reveals as well as the twists and turns in relationships she pursues, with other women.

Polyamorous Life

February 3, 2010

Polyamory is something I never imagined I would get involved with. In fact, I had no clue what polyamory was until about two years ago. My boyfriend started talking to me about it and I began doing research. He also had introduced it to his wife who was hesitant at first to even get involved in Polyamory. It was mostly because she wanted the traditional monogamous marriage.

It was when he had a heart to heart talk with the two of us individually and as a group that he made it clear he wanted two women. This was difficult for both myself and the wife to digest for awhile. At first I felt like I had been lied to believing that one day he was going to leave his wife whom he was having a difficult time with. The wife felt like she had been deceived believing that they had put their past (regarding any other relationships and threesomes) behind them and then I came along.

Our journey has been like a roller coaster the last three years. In this blog I will be writing about the journey from the beginning to now.